It's funny, every time I tell someone how old the girls are they inevitably respond with some variation of "Oh (two/six) is a fun age". And while yes I suppose that both girls are at "fun ages", I am here to bear witness that 2 and 6 are also, at times very NOT fun ages. And as a new step-parent I would LOVE for people to stop trying to rosey parenthood up for me and be honest about what having kids at these ages is really like, cause there are times that I would probably pay millions (well no not millions but at least $5) just to hear someone say that kids at these ages do (fill in random misbehavior), and its perfectly NORMAL.
Unless you are the parent of a child who is not biologically related to you, you most likely do not understand the pressure I put on myself to "parent right". You probably grew out of that stage by the time your kid hit one and you realized they wouldn't break if you left the room for 2 consecutive minutes. I am still fully in that stage. I want to do everything "right". And being that the hubs works swing shifts (2:30pm-11:45pm), this often has to include disciplining the "right" way too. And man oh man, do you have any idea what kind of pressure there is in disciplining someone else's kid (yes they are mine in my heart but you know what I mean)!
I bring all this up because the girls and I had a rather tough night last night. Our oldest girl very nearly went to bed without dinner, while our youngest had a conniption fit because she had to take a shower (oh the horrors) after standing right in front of the potty, pants already down, and peeing all over herself (we've had great success with potty training, but every once in awhile this happens and I don't know why, perhaps confusion from seeing the little boys at day care go to the potty?)
Bella's story is short. She peed, she cried/screamed. She showered, she screamed/cried. She got out dressed herself for bed and all was right in the world again. "Hi Ree, ah bah dee" (she switches back and forth between calling me Mommy, and Ree (short for Marie) and ah bah dee is her made up word for well evything, she's even composed an ah bah dee song that she sings in the bath).
Alexis was a bit more complicated. She is in the first grade and is learning to read. Every night her teacher sends home a choice board and Alexis picks what she wants to do for her homework that night. For the past month or so I've been having her pick and do her homework on her own while I cook dinner. Last night we followed this routine per usual but when she brought me her work to check over, it wasn't done the way her directions said it should be. Long story short, at some point she memorized her homework choices (so she wouldn't have to read them) and was doing her assignments the way she'd remembered them rather than the way they were written. Thus began the 2 HOUR struggle to get her to read he homework choice (not all of the choices, just the one she'd chosen to complete last night). Before you judge, you should know that Alexis can read quite well. She's very good at sounding out the letters, remembering the rules about long and short vowels , and how letter sounds can go together (c+h=ch). Unfortunately, she does not like to read. I'd said it's fair to say she HATES it with all the passion 6 yr old girl can muster. Thus the 2 hour struggle. It wasn't that she COULDN'T read her homework but rather that she WOULDN'T.
There were tears, there was time out, there were excuses, bargaining, she even began hoping up and down at one point during the height of a temper tantrum. All the while I sat in the same place I'd been, spoke to her in a calm and even voice, and explained her choices. Homework first then dinner (as always) or if she continued to refuse to do her homework (which was really just fixing it so it matched the directions) she would also be refusing dinner. (I took a gamble on this one, as Alexis generally doesn't give a hoot about food. Sometimes I think she'd go a week without eating if we let her). She chose no homework and no dinner (backfire!). I had to get creative, I could not let my husband's kid go to bed hungry but I didn't want to be the push over that let her get away with temper tantrums. I improvised and repeatedly mentioned how hungry she must be having not had dinner yet. I eventually wore her down, she read the assignment in 3 minutes flat, scarfed down her dinner, and got herself ready and into bed (phew an entire evening's routine condensed into about 7 minutes).
So despite the fact that I did not yell, scream, spank, or any of the other various methods of punishment that are oh so ineffective (at least in my house), I'm still left worrying that I messed it all up. That she'll hold this one night against me and I really will be the Evil Stepmother in her mind.
So no, I tell you no, by no means is 6 an all around fun age. As for 2, they call it the terrible 2's for a reason people!
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